That went like I thought it would

Things have been going well between the BF & I. I told him about our therapy session this coming Wednesday. We spent some time together over the weekend. He invited me to church with him. It’s nothing like I have been to…it was non denomination and not a “traditional” type service. I enjoyed it. It gave me some things to think about…the topic was managing stress. I would like to go again.

Unfortunately on Saturday when talking with my mom she brought him up & it didn’t go well. All I got out was we were talking and that was about it. I let her say her piece…not much else you can do right? I understand those are her feelings, but this is also my life & I need to do what I need to. We haven’t spoke since. I’m not sure what will happen between me & my parents, but right now they aren’t my top priority. I spoke with my dad today cause he is still visiting. He was easier to speak with cause he didn’t get as emotional (or call me stupid). Basically he doesn’t trust him not to run off again which I understand. I was able to share more of my thoughts with dad & we are going to have dinner tomorrow before he leaves. The BF has told some of his friends and other family members we are working things out…they have responded positively. I haven’t mentioned my parent’s reaction as I want to give them more time as well as us.

I really do believe we can work this out and build our future. Otherwise I wouldn’t be risking my relationship with my parents. I have to say this past month has really taught me you can’t judge other people and their decisions because you don’t know their whole story. If somebody is happy then I am happy for them. If they are not then I will be there to support them if they want it.

Lately I have been getting news of friends ending long term relationships. One girlfriend lived with a guy for close to 13 years probably & that just ended last week. Now I’m sure there was a slow burn to the end there but it was still surprising. A bigger shocker came this morning when another friend told me her husband of almost 14 years moved out last week cause he’s having an affair & they are divorcing. I’m still like wow. These were couples I thought was doing it “right”. In some ways I’m like WTF is going on & should I be worried? But I’m not. I feel confident the BF & I have a solid relationship we are building, we are getting help & taking it just one day at a time.

I have one more session with the therapist I was seeing thru my work program tomorrow. I kept the appointment I guess just to talk. My anxiety feels better. As I feel more confident in our relationship that stuff is going away. I sleep thru the nights and don’t feel sick in the mornings. My weight has leveled off and I’m sure will eventually return (that’s kind of a bummer lol).

Here’s to the start of spring…perhaps its a sign of new growth & things to come??


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