Trying not to be weak

I’ve been doing good. Staying busy this week. And actually next week got booked up already as well…yay! Really enjoyed our Thursday girl night so we’re going to make that a weekly event for whoever can come. 

But I’m feeling weak. Today POS’s youngest daughter graduates high school (and it’s been an adventure getting there) which from what we’ve talked is one of the big deals for him I’m sure. I never contacted him after the phone misdial but I feel like I should send a congrats enjoy be a proud dad type of text today? I mean I don’t want to be a giant dick and not acknowledge this is a big deal for him but I also don’t want to give in to my no initiating contact rule.

What say you guys?? If I send a congrats text (with no expectation of anything in return) am I taking a step backwards? I admit my FB has shown me being quite active/busy this week so I know he’s seen that. And a few new friends (guys) have been added. Not sure if that’s been noticed. Honestly I would say no since he’s preoccupied with graduation but one can hope it’s got the wheels turning. lol 

Looking forward to kickball tonight. It will be fun to see everyone and POS won’t be there so in a way that’s nice. My anxiety does still get a little rattled when I know he’s going to be there. Why must I love him? Why can’t I love a man who doesn’t have issues?

I also listed my house on a website today to hopefully get more action. In 3.5 weeks the property manager has only had 2 showings and they both no showed. Wtf. I do not want to be double paying more than 2 months. I know I signed a contract with her but at what point can I go shopping for somebody else? It’s getting a little frustrating! People keep saying my house will rent fast so I’m confused why nothing has happened at all. 🤔


2 thoughts on “Trying not to be weak”

  1. If it were me and I wanted to keep the no initiating contact policy then I wouldn’t contact the “POS”. But I also get that there’s a lot of love and history there so its not easy to not try to contact the person.

    Liked by 1 person

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