staying warm

I know it’s much colder elsewhere & I’m not complaining, but this weather isn’t what I signed up for when I moved to FL. WTF 30’s??? Really??? Of course my friends up north give me a hard time (I can’t even imagine what they’re going thru!), but what they don’t realize is the damage the cold does down here. You like that orange juice? Be prepared to pay a lot more. Heck the iguanas are falling out of the trees cause they are cold & not functioning well!

So happy to have made it to Friday! I went back to work Tuesday which was fine. With time off during the holidays & coworkers on vacation it’s been a little crazy, but it stayed handled. My supervisor came back Wednesday & right away she starts sniping at me about things. Some people are just so unhappy with life. Little does she know I was approached at a holiday party about a job which I had sort of considered (there’s some other issues here as well). Well I decided it was worth at least hearing what they had to say so Thursday I had off for doctor appointments & I also did an impromptu interview/meeting with that company. We had a nice discussion (I met with the owner & CEO) and they are going to put together a package to offer me. As ticked as I am (and have been getting), I know better than to just quit my job. But I didn’t move 1300 miles away from everything I knew to be miserable & I still follow that mantra even though it’s been over 4 years. Being honest I have been stressed/unhappy for the last 6 months & I think I know deep down something is gonna have to change. Unfortunately I really like what I do for my job, I just no longer care for the people around me (their shitty attitudes are soul sucking). So from what I see I can departments where I am if an opening is available (and if I can get hired–another big process), the unhappy people leave or I leave. I know one of them is due to retire this summer so maybe I can wait it out & hope things change for the better? I do have some very sweet perks at my current job (vacation time, heath benefits, hours, security) that I would definitely have to be compensated for financially to give up. So we’ll see what they have to offer….

Tonight is the start of kickball playoffs! Except we don’t play until 9pm so we are going to freeze. lol I get to see Brian (yup, he’s been texting me everyday going on 3 weeks now) assuming he sticks around after his game. I’ll be a little curious cause I haven’t seen him in person in almost 2 weeks. Wonder how he will act? I will also see that side chick that was so informative about him (she plays on another team) so this could be fun. She came to our NYE party & made out with like 3 different guys. None were the guys she came with (I assume she used him to attend cause we weren’t inviting her) & 1 guy was in fact my friend who came cause his GF (who I am also friends with) was working that night. Yup, that guy bolted as soon as I walked around the corner & caught that going on (I said nothing & walked right by). I told my roommate after that she needed to get the fuck out cause she was going to cause a fight with all these drunk guys. I mean what kind of skanky ho are you that every 20 minutes you are changing guys & approaching all of them at the party? I saved one of the guys by grabbing his hand when she came up so she quickly apologized to me (let her assume we were together) & moved on. Ick…just ick.


Happy blogging anniversary!!

It’s been 3 years today since I registered my blog. 202 posts. Yay me! This is starting to reach a long term relationship status for me. lol

So much has happened in 3 years. Wow…January 2015 I was waiting to close on my house. There has been love, loss, friendships, travel, accomplishments, moves. I think it’s pretty neat to be able to look back on it all…even the ugly parts. I recognize the growth & change in myself. Hopefully towards becoming a better well rounded version of me!

I am no longer flirting with 40, but closing in on it quickly. End of May is fast approaching! I joke & make fun of it, but honestly it doesn’t bother me. At least now it doesn’t. I have a few more things I’d like done before the big 4-0 gets here so let’s touch base on this again in a few months.

more catching up

so to resume the catch up of the past few months….

My living situation changed again. Before the hurricane in September arrived (the real one, not the roommate’s GF) he informed me that his GF would be moving in October 1st. But nothing was really going to change he claimed. She still was going to work several hours away so she would only be staying at the house a few days a week (like she was doing) when she wasn’t working (yeah I don’t understand any of it either). Men are so dumb. We all knew it was going to change, but ok he can keep on believing it’s not going to. hahahaha!!! Then during the hurricane like literally as it’s passing over the top of us they are having some big fight lets talk about our relationship moment while completely intoxicated which even you can now guess didn’t go well. Storm ends, GF leaves, he informs me they are broke up & she is not moving in. I figured in a few days that would change cause that’s the game they play (high school make up break up), but when it reached over 2 weeks I was even a bit surprised. Then I come home one night from the bar to find a moving truck in the driveway & oh yeah she’s moved in. Super. I don’t want this drama in my life so I figure I’ve got about 2-3 months before it gets really bad (which will be during the holidays so even more awesome) & I need to be gone. Time to start checking the housing ads. After 2 weeks of her being there I know I definitely will need to be moving cause it is just SO weird. Nobody speaks in the house & you can feel the tenseness. Luckily I was working weekends at my side job too & that got me away from it. End of October my brother John asks if I want to move in with him. He & his GF had ended things & she had moved out already. I’ll be honest at first I was worried about the drama & BS it would cause (these people were part of the group when we went to Costa Rica together), but then we talked logistics more (he has a 9 yo son & 4 yo daughter that live there part time also) & it started to sound like it could work. I gave myself a few days to ponder it & decided I really needed to make the best decision for me so I agreed to move in. I gave the roommate & his GF 10 days notice since I had no contract (I pay rent on the 10th) & started moving my things over early November. I only moved about a mile down the street so location wise not much has really changed for me. Once I did move in I wasn’t around much the 1st month anyways (travel, working extra, house sitting for 2 weeks) which I think helped give the kids more time to adjust. And me. hahaha! I have never lived with kids before & it’s a trip!! They make me laugh & I enjoy their company. It’s been 2 months now & I don’t regret it. It was a good decision for me. Yes, there was some drama shit & still is from his ex-gf, but it doesn’t affect me. That part of my life is going pretty well.

Dating has been interesting. I think it was end of September/early October when I got a random text from Will. Yup the guy who just disappeared after saying he lost his job back the end of July. He wanted to talk. I’m thinking well if I get dinner out of it at a nice restaurant then I’ll go listen for a bit. Turns out he wasn’t in the area so I was like ehhh f off don’t want to hear it. hahaha!! Went on a few dates with some guys either from online or friends introduced but nothing ever sparked or came of it. Fuckboy got in there for a few weeks. Mark from the summer kept popping up. We have dinner like once a month or so, but definitely never going to be anything there. We were at a mutual friends party in early December & he crossed the line as far as behavior & appropriateness goes for friends. But he was so drunk he had no idea when he tried to contact me a few days later. It’s sad really. I haven’t seen him since & he just texted me for Christmas, but I can’t have one sided relationships. Maybe you think I’m great to have in your life yet what do you bring to mine?? It’s not 50/50. I have learned to value myself more this year & I want more from the people I choose to be around. The loser users can step aside.

I did meet a guy mid-December that I have been pondering (Brian). It was at kickball (yup still playing lol). We went out that night to hear my friend’s band. Had a good time & he acted interested. Been texting me every day. Hung out with his friends for drinks the next week. Ok. Now I’m kind of wondering where things are cause he’s only hugged me & that’s it. Christmas Eve night I’m super bored (all my family is up north) & he was going to a friend’s party after his family dinner so asked if I wanted to go. Had a nice time & got back to his house (he lives close by me) and hung out some more. He then says he’s going to bed & I can stay if I want. Hmmmm…. Do you want me to? Sure. Do you have pjs? Sure. And that was it. We laid in bed. He did have his arm around me all night. But nothing happened. Seriously????????????? Not even a kiss or anything. I woke up about 7 & was like uh oh I need to get home before Santa comes (living with kids!) so I got up. He got up also & walked me out and gave me a hug. And we’ve continued to text since. But no future plans have been made either.

So wtf?? Am I in the friend zone? Does he like me & isn’t sure? Is it that time of year? I have no frigging clue! I feel next time I see him I am going to ask about it.


Feeling pretty good overall

It’s been a crazy few months. So crazy I haven’t been able to do much updating here. And some funny shit has happened that I’m sure would have been entertaining for you all.

Let’s see…Irma passed by. I had little damage at my house. Just a few screens needed replacing & that was it. The renters said they didn’t have power for about a week so they were in a shelter for a few days & then a hotel. Things had been going well at the house for a few months except the last few weeks of course. Something is wrong with the plumbing/pipes. Had the septic emptied, but didn’t resolve the issue. Now need a plumber to come fish the line cause something is clogged down the toilet. I’m really hoping the renters dropped something down the toilet that got stuck & it’s not roots or something bad with a broken pipe. We’ll see….

Work has been nuts. When I went back after Irma (had about a week off) people were off the wall batshit. I get there was a lot of stress & freaking out, but come on. Be a little professional. It was so bad in fact that I went home after the first day & restarted on my meds that I had stopped in February. I had been completely fine the entire hurricane yet going back to work in that environment had me literally an anxious mess in hours. So I bit the bullet & started back so within a few days I felt “normal” again. I felt like such a failure though I told my very close friends & therapist. It was hard for me to admit I was losing control again, but it was the best decision cause I could feel things starting to spiral. Except instead of throwing up I was eating like a starved fat kid at the buffet so I have packed on quite a bit weight. At this point I am 30 pounds heavier than I was a year ago (more on that later).

About mid-September I met a guy named Andy who I later renamed Fuckboy. I had a feeling about him being a bit of one, but my friends were really pushing for me to give him a chance & be open minded. After several weeks of him being up my ass everyday texting (yeah that was a sign so I kept my walls up) & hanging out a few times, I run into him at a bar on a Saturday night. With some other lady. The night after he cancels a date with me last minute cause of some emergency. Of course my friends bless their hearts jump into support mode–she’s not pretty, she looks so old, etc–but I’m not going to bash her. She’s irrelevant to me. I decide wtf do I have to lose & rather than just always wonder…I walk up to him on 1 side & sweetly say “hey what’s up?”. I have never seen somebody squirm & refuse eye contact & look so uncomfortable. hahaha!!! He stammers out a few things & actually has the balls to introduce me to whoever she is (I made sure to clearly say my name & shake her hand & smile big) before I turned my attention back on him. I remained calm & spoke quietly so I can’t be accused of acting crazy (we know how men LOVE to say that!!). I was like “what is going on?” to which he stated she’s his ex-gf who he thinks they are getting back together. Really after everything you said about her? He cringed & whether she heard me or not I don’t care. I said so the whole date the night before was fake & he never intended to follow thru. Oh no he assures me it wasn’t. Really?? Then riddle me Fuckboy how you are going on a date with me Friday night & getting back with her on Saturday? I should have leaned around him & let her know that was his plan. hahaha! Instead I said oh ok so you just did to me what you said you hate people doing to you–not being over their ex & wasting your time. Oh no he keeps saying. I just calmly kept repeating yes you did before he finally relented & says well yeah I guess so, I’m sorry. I said hey, best of luck then & walked away. Of course after that I was done with him & moved on with my night, but he kept staring at my group so my friends took turns waving. I was like whatever Fuckboy. I have no time for lies & BS in my life. I am glad I approached him & called him out rather than be left wondering wtf.

So that wraps up September & into October for me. I’ll get more caught up this week!


Irma-gawd 🌀

Hurricane Irma has come & gone. 🙋🏼

I am well! In fact the house I’m a roommate at never lost power so I was watching tv (news & movies) thru it all. So lucky!! 🍀 My car was parked in the garage so that was ok too. I felt quite safe bunkered in my corner room. The windows were boarded up & I had candles ready. I heard the winds when the eye got closer (it passed just to the east) & other than a few clunks on the roof it was ok. I realize how very blessed & fortunate I am. 🙏

We got lucky it came down to a Category 2 & the path went a little more east after landfall so not a direct hit. I was somehow one of the few left in my friend circle with power. Today they have all been waiting for power to be restored & not all were visited by FPL. I went outside about 9am after the rain stopped for a quick peek. I saw standing water at the end of the driveway & along the side yards so I didn’t go near that. But looking around I didn’t see any major damage to the house or any other homes on the street. Lots of leaves & some branches but nothing bad. Again very lucky!!

My work is closed until Wednesday. They had the water shut off during the hurricane cause of a main break in the City water system (which did get repaired today) but there still is not any power. I still need to check on my house & the family condo when I can get there, but I haven’t heard from the property manager so I assume nothing major happened. 

My heart goes out to everyone affected by Irma & my prayers are with them. Thank you to my friends & family that were there for me. Love you all! 😘


Here comes Irma 🌀

I am on the Gulf (west coast about 1/2 way between the top & bottom of the state) in Florida. All week it’s been a guessing game where she was going, but it looks like she’s coming directly for my city now. I’ll be honest…I was hoping it would hit land by Miami & go up the east coast. Then the track started shifting west. I started hoping it would keep drifting west and we’d get the edge, but no such luck.

I’ve chosen to stay. First of all early evacuation wasn’t an option for me as I had work. Work did eventually decide to close Friday (and now Monday but no kidding since Irma will be passing right then 😂). Next on Tuesday gas & water was already running out in this area even though it was still predicted for an east coast hit. People were acting just a tad crazy. So between no gas & the main roads becoming a parking lot leaving wasn’t easy. They say you don’t evacuate for the wind, but the surge & water afterwards. People leaving before they should creates the problems & cauyus there was this week. 

I’ll admit this is my 1st hurricane. And apparently I’m picking a doozie! I just recently celebrated my 4th FL-versary and there has been nothing like this. I’ve gone thru massive blizzards & leveling tornadoes. Even rain & flooding. But not a hurricane & definitely not a big one. So I’ve done a lot of educating myself this week. Speaking to friends who have been thru it & others that have lived here. I feel secure in the house (concrete block). Roommate finished boarding up the windows today & my car is actually in the garage now (it’s normally outside 24/7). We’re not in a flood zone nor an evacuation zone for the storm surge. I stocked up on foods that don’t need the fridge & water and Gatorade. I know we’ll lose power. Honestly that’s the part that probably bothers me most. The storm will have passed. The wind and rains stop. But we most likely won’t have power. It could be a week. Argh!! I’ve never been thru that part before. And it’s early September in Florida so temps still in the low 90s so another issue. I’ve got friends close by so I can hike over if I need to. I got cash this week too just in case. Car is filled with gas.  I’m going to take one last shower in the morning & then fill the tub with water. I’m going to have a small bag packed in case I need to get out. Be prepared has been my motto!

So best of luck to all in Irma’s path. I believe all of Florida will be affected somehow. Be safe, make good choices & we’ll get thru this. 🙏🤞🌀


Where the wind blows me

That’s how I’m feeling today. No real plans. Blah weather. I’m in the mood for something but I couldn’t tell you what??? 🤷🏼‍♀️

Right now I’m starting at the car dealership to get my tire replaced. Yup that’s the 3rd tire with a nail since this spring. I have no idea where I’m driving or parking that this is suddenly such an issue for me. Thank goodness for that tire warranty!!!! 🙏

Not sure what my next stop will be. We’re getting a lot of rain. ⛈ Not sure if that’s an off shoot from hurricane Harvey? I feel like just poking around & seeing what I find. This is rare for me cause usually I have everything so scheduled if I want to do anything. 

Here’s to hoping everyone has a wonderful weekend! 💙💜❤️


Just a girl who's flirting with 40…while trying to find love & happiness by the beach