Tag Archives: growth

Hump day ho hums

Blah the rain. Yes we needed it. Yay we are ok longer a high fire risk. The grass is green & growing. But come on…since last Thursday night it’s been on/off & starting Monday pretty much all day rain. ☔️ So over it. I miss the sun. I miss my activities. I would like to not be wearing my raincoat all the time. 🙄

Monday started out with me driving to work & a low tire pressure light going on. On the tire I just replaced 6 weeks ago. Work was a bit of a shit show cause apparently people didn’t do things while I was gone which made meeting the deadlines that day insane. I left work & hauled ass to the car dealership so they could look at the tire. Turns out another nail (WTF??!!) and the computer needs to be adjusted cause it was the other side that was flat (not the side it was saying). Again wtf??? Thank goodness again for that extra tire warranty cause that’s another $400 I didn’t have to shell out when they ordered the tire. 🙏 I then headed to the gym where my face & jaw was starting to hurt so much I half assed it just get it done. I apologized to my awesome trainer…she knows when I’m not right & isn’t a jerk about it. I had taken a pain pill at work early, but I can’t drive on them so couldn’t take another. Got home, made dinner & went to bed! 👊

Tuesday more rain. More of the same work crap (still catching up). But changed my dinner plans when cornhole cancelled! My favorite local event is going on…restaurants offer fixed menus for a low price for 2 weeks. Usually these are upscale or places I never go so trying to get to a few new ones again this year. Except my frigging tooth pain is really putting a damper on things!! Nevertheless I was determined last night to eat & it was fabulous. Had a good time catching up with my gf & her bf. One of my favorite stores is having their semi annual sale so I stopped there & can you believe I found exactly what I have been looking for?? On sale??!! That never happens so it made for a much improved day!! And I got a cute new dress for peanuts at the thrift store on lunch break. Day improving. 👍

Today again it’s raining. Yeah shocker. 😂 I’m hitting the gym after work & then home. I need an early night to catch up. My tooth is still hurting & it’s been a week so I’m thinking there is something else wrong? I have a follow up dental appointment tomorrow.

Good news…William & I have continued to stay in touch. He’s back in Seattle, but coming home Sunday so we’re doing dinner that night. Date #2!! I’m trying not to be too excited or get ahead, but I am looking forward to seeing him & spending actual time together. It’s been almost a month we’ve been “talking” yet have only met that one time. Which is really weird for me (I’ve never done anything like this before) although I like it! How crazy is that? Things are moving slow which is good right now cause I have a lot of my own stuff going on. Fingers crossed 🤞 

It’s been a year… 

Since I defurnished my house, started trying to rent it, went on Craigslist for new housing & moved. Wow. It’s gone fast. And it feels like a lot has happened. I’ve moved another time since. I’ve learned a lot about who I am. I’ve put weight back on. I’ve been on & off the meds. I’ve made a new social circle(s) of friends. I’ve joined a gym (and actually like it!). I’m in therapy. I’m learning how to handle life & what I can control. I’ve learned to cut out people who aren’t beneficial to have around. I’ve done some traveling. I have actually been saving money. I’m recognizing when to have “me” time and why it’s important. I’m attempting to date again. I’m trying new things. I’m putting myself out there even if I might fail.

I guess that is a lot I’ve done the last year! Still a work in progress. Still growing. Which is good cause one should never stop.

Here’s to more good times & having faith in the rough times that it won’t last forever! 🥂

Checking back in

So I’ve fallen off the writing wagon. Which was bad cause the past few months have had some amazing blog worthy moments & because I’m sure at times I really could have used the writing therapy. Honestly sometimes it’s just such a PITA to type on my iPhone that I just wasn’t into it. But I’m back. Again. Lol

So let’s see…checking my last post was right after I moved to the new house in November (gosh it’s been that long??) so we’ll start there. It’s going well! The new roommate Larry is great. I was straight up this is business & I don’t mix it when he suggested his friend asking me out or things like that. Just not going down that path. Nope. Nada. No thanks. We get along great, don’t see much of each other & it’s working! Lol. No really I do like it a lot. I basically have the half of the house for my bedroom and bathroom so space wise it’s great. Location wise it’s worked out so much better that I anticipated. I’m closer to work, friends, activities, gym, places I like to go. Not that I was far before but now we’re talking minutes which is fab! Him & his gf seem to have drama. GF & I do get along which is nice cause she can be the crazy jealous type but I also made it very clear to her from the get go this is a living business situation & anyways I don’t go after taken men (unlike quite a few sluts in this town). Larry & I recently had a talk to touch base about things and both of us are happy with the situation. Yay!!

Cornhole…my partner & I ended up winning the series for our level!!! Who would have thought?? We wore panda onesie suits (it was cold by FL standards that night so good thing) for laughs & we rocked our way to the top!!! It was a blast & I’m grateful he played the season with me. Then the 2nd season of cornhole started & I returned to playing with a previous partner (who is so much better than I). We didn’t have the best regular season but come play off night we both really got our shit together and shocker…we won!! This time it was against the higher level players (including my FL brothers) so it was huge for me on a personal level!! I have been between seasons now & haven’t started playing again. 

Kickball had been good. I love having plans on Friday nights. If I want to go out after I totally still can or most of the times we end up just hanging out at the ball fields laughing & yakking & watching other games. It’s a really nice way to wind down after the week & catch up with friends. Plus some have their kids there so we play games or cook out. Again proving you don’t have to be shit faced in a bar to have a good time!

Remember my tooth problems??? Well that finally got resolved the day before xmas when I had my wisdom teeth on the left side removed. Excellent drugs! And it was nice to spend the holiday in a haze to be honest. Unfortunately it was the only opening for like a month so I had to take it. Sucked to use my holidays off from work like that but not much could be done. My roommate was out of town & the dentist office wouldn’t accept Uber as a “responsible party” since I was getting totally knocked out (oh yeah this was real surgery it turned out) so my mom flew down to take care of me. The parents were coming anyways so she came a few days before Dad to handle me. Hahahaha!!! Bless her heart.

Speaking of parents…our relationship has continued to improve. Obviously they are happy POS is gone. We are improving communications & it’s a work in progress I say. I love them & I know they love me. Really I am quite blessed.

I still see my therapist monthly. She’s the bomb! We talk about whatever has happened, what is coming, you name it. I really believe she has helped me see things in new ways (especially how I see myself) & dealing with situations. I was still on the Prozac until start of February. I had been feeling pretty good for awhile & it’s not something I want to depend on forever. So I did a bunch of research on the internet (yeah I know super reliable), but since I was on the lowest dose possible and not for super long I felt ok trying it. I found basically a list of things you should have in order to stop taking it which I did cold turkey. And being honest…I feel ok. I do have about a week worth of Prozac & my original sleeping pills (which I’ve only taken 2 of) should things start to go backwards. But the key is I know my signs now when the anxiety is spiraling & I haven’t reached those levels. I’m not saying I don’t get anxious or have issues, but I’m better equipped now to handle them & not be bothered so much it affects me.

Still going to the gym. I celebrated my 6 months!!! I have to say that has been a huge positive step for me. 1–it’s physically healthy for me. Even though I’ve put on weight (too much) I am probably in the best shape I’ve been my adult life. I want to lose 10 pounds (the healthy way, not anxiety-ed out throwing up stress my life is a mess way) which my trainers feel is very reasonable with a few diet changes (I got really bad eating soft mushy crap carby sugar shit when my tooth pain was bad for so long) & an increase in activity. 2–it’s mentally healthy for me to go work out. I enjoy it, I’m feeling more confident, it is a stress reliever. I go after work on Mondays & Thursdays so it’s a good way to laugh off things plus we know how I love a routine. 3–I have met a great group of people. They aren’t the “culty” gym which is pretty common in this area. They are so supportive of one another & friendly & fun. We go out to hear bands, dinners & drinks, events. I’ve even met some great girlfriends which is nice. I love all my “brothers” but actually having girlfriends now is so nice.

The dating scene…let’s just say Tinder is interesting. Hahahaha!!! But I’ll wait til next time for all that.

But life overall is good! I survived 2016 which was a shit-tastic year (and not just for me but many others I know too) & am determined 2017 will be amazing. In so many ways!